Crystal Town Series 4 - Episode 47 - Please Tell Me This Is A Joke

Kacey Wellington is a strong belivever that family is the most important thing in the entire world.

Her elder sister Jenna also believed that family was the most important thing in the entire world.

They both believed that over the Christmas season nothing was more important than spending time with those dearest.

However neither of the siblings were in a festive mood when they saw each other.

Kacey: Hiya Jen.
Jenna: Hey Kace, you alright?
Kacey: Not too bad.

Kacey: The whole resturant thing is really stressing me out though!
Jenna: I can't believe you've had to delay it until tonight. You must be going crazy.
Kacey: First it got delayed a day but now Mum thought it was appropiate to delay it until tonight.
Jenna: Well it's the 23rd won't people be too busy?
Kacey: Actually I think the entire neighbourhoods coming for launch tonight.
Jenna: Oh, then why are you stressed?
Kacey: I dunno. Why are you stressed?
Jenna: Max ditching me over Christmas - that's why I'm stressed!
Kacey: He's working?
Jenna: Yep, was flown off to New York.
Kacey: Ouch, lets get inside yeah? It's freezing!

Louise: Jenna! Hiya honey!
Jenna: Hey mum, it's great to see you. How have you been?
Louise: I've been good thanks. How are you?
Jenna: Not too bad. Except Max has gone and left me on my own over Christmas.
Louise: Aww, a mans gotta work Jen. At least you'll be with your family though eh?
Jenna: Yeah, I guess.
Louise: Come on Jen - come check out the resturant!

Jenna: Wow!
Kacey: We thought you'd like it.
Jenna: Oh my gosh - it's so fancy!
Louise: Yeah we're hoping to attract everyone from working class families to people who are passing through the town on buissness.
Jenna: I can hardly recongise the place from when it was a pub! Which is a good thing I think considering the whole hostage thing last year.
Kacey: Yeah. But lets not talk about that eh?
Jenna: Nah. So the pubs been gone for almost a year now? How have you had money coming in?
Kacey: Dad left us alot of money in his will and I guess Mum's over the top savings account came in handy.
Louise: I told you we might need it in future.

William: Explain to me why you've invited your sexist boss around for lunch again?
Kayleigh: Because we haven't exactly got on as he constanly makes offensive comments (sighs) and I wanna give him a chance. I don't want to have to report him.
William: Really? You want to report him!?
Kayleigh: Will - you don't know what he's like! He's rude, arrogant and as you said is sexist!
William: Maybe he's just old fashioned.
Kayleigh: He's about forty!?
William: A cars pulling up outside, they're here.

Marge: Oh Kayleigh! We can't tell you how chuffed we were to accept your invite for dinner!
Kayleigh: No problem Marge, this is my husband William. William this is Marge.
Marge: Pleasure to meet you love.
William: You too.
Roger: Hello Kayleigh.
Kayleigh: Roger.
Marge: We've gotta sort out this problem between the both of you!
Kayleigh: Yeah, we should.
William: It would be in the best intentions of everybody wouldn't it? (Laughs).
Roger: Well your in luck! We brought champange!
Kayleigh: Excellent, lets go in the kitchen so I can get some glasses!

Kayleigh: Well here we go... ooh this is a difficult one this!
Marge: (Laughs) Use your muscles Kayleigh.
Roger: Want me or William to do it? It's a mans job.
Marge: Oh for goodness sake Roger.
Kayleigh: Alright it's a new record, it's been a minute and you've already made a comment.
Roger: Honestly I don't mean too! They just slip out.
Marge: Lets just forget about that eh? Wahey you've done it.
Kayleigh: Yep I have.

Kayleigh: Here's a toast to all of us and the hope that we all have an amazing christmas and a fantastic new year!
William: Cheers!
Marge: I'll drink to that!
Roger: What a toast!

Karina: Man this is gonna be weird - haven't been home for so long!

(Sounds of people talking)
Karina: Excuse me? Is somebody there!?

Eddie: Karina! Wow, you're home!
Jennifer: Oh my god! Auntie Karina!

Eddie: Where have you been? You've been gone for almost a year!
Karina: Ah I just took a really long holiday is all. I needed it.
Jennifer: Auntie Karina's home! Auntie Karina's home! Yay! Yay!
Karina: (Laughs) Sweetheart I'll pop round the pub later and we can go out to the pictures or something yeah?
Eddie: Actually we're living with Harry Langford and the pubs not there anymore. It's a resturant now. It opens tonight.
Karina: What!? How much have I missed!?
Eddie: Well me and Kacey have kinda broke up and well on New Years day last year gunmen took everybody in the pub hostage.
Karina: What!? Was everyone alright!?
Eddie: Erm, well Ruby Appleton and Hilary Kim were killed.
Karina: Hilary!? Oh my god! Poor Kayleigh! Oh Chris must have been devastated too!
Eddie: Yeah they were.

Karina: Oh god. That's just horrible!
Eddie: Yeah, well would you mind taking Jen out for a bit? I've gotta head over to the resturant and help out with the launch. It's gonna be awkward.
Karina: Ouch. Well can I come get her from Harry's later? I really could do with a shower.
Eddie: Yeah, sure. No problem.
Jennifer: You'll come and get me later?
Karina: Sure will honey.
Eddie: See you later on Karina. Nice to have you back!
Karina: Thanks.

Jennifer: I'm so excited Daddy! Auntie Karina is home!
Eddie: Yeah it's good isn't it?

Karina: My face!

Ben: Are you alright honey?
Michelle: No. I'm not.
Ben: Come on Michelle, you're home with your family.
Michelle: I'm not talking to my mum alright? Not after the way she spoke to me the other day!
Ben: I think she feels bad about it love.
Michelle: I dont care! How could she just stand there and say that I didn't care Ruby was killed!? It keeps me awake at night that because of what I did all them years ago that Cate took it out on my baby sister!
Ben: Michelle, please - don't talk about it. You'll just get yourself worked up. I'm party responsible too I guess.
Michelle: No! You've always tried to help me when it came to Cate and you let Kacey Wellington and William Porter out of the pub and you came back in and attacked Cate! If it wasn't for you more people could of been killed.
Ben: I know that, but that doesen't make my guilt any easier.

Lennie: Honey can you please go up and try and talk to Michelle? We're leaving for your mothers soon and she won't want to see you and Michelle rowing over Christmas.
Amelia: There's no point Len, she doesen't want anything to do with me.
Lennie: Well you can't blame her for what you said.
Amelia: Yes! I know I shouldn't of said to her that she didn't care Ruby died but she won't talk to me so what can I do?
Lennie: Just go and apolgise.
Elliot: Yeah mum, please do.
Vanessa: Yeah, we really would like a Christmas where our mum and our older sister aren't down each others throats.
Amelia: Alright, fine. I'll do it.

Amelia: Michelle - where are you going?
Michelle: Me and Ben are taking our things down to the car.
Amelia: Look Michelle about the other day - what I said.
Michelle: Don't wanna talk about it Mum. Alright?
Amelia: Look we're going to your nans soon -
Michelle: What did I just say!?
Ben: Michelle - come on.
Michelle: I don't want to talk about it! Get that into your head.
Ben: (Sighs).
Michelle: Come on Ben we're putting our stuff in the car.

Roger: Thank you so much for lunch Kayleigh, you know how to make a meal!
Marge: I couldn't agree more, thank you. It was devine!
Kayleigh: Thank you very much I'm glad you enjoyed it.
William: Would everybody like a cup of coffee and some of Kayleigh's home baked cookies?
Marge: That would be marvellous!
Roger: I sure would!
Kayleigh: Oh wait - Will we're out of milk. Could you nip to the store quickly and fetch some?
William: Why can't you go.
Kayleigh: Because I asked you?
William: Fine. Anything for my darling wife.
Marge: Aww, that's so adorable.
(Roger makes a whipping sound)
Marge: Oh Roger you moron.
Roger: I'm sorry - I'm sorry! Didn't mean too!
Kayleigh: (Slightly annoyed) Lets not worry about it.
William: I'll see you in a few minutes Kay.
Kayleigh: Aright love.

Marge: So... that meal honestly was lovely. I'd love to prepare it for my mother sometime. Do you have the recipie written down?
Kayleigh: Ah! It was my own mothers (laughs). It's in the kitchen, I'll just go get it.
Marge: Thank you Kayleigh.

Marge: You need to pack it in!
Roger: What!? I've toned it down.
Marge: You know that Kayleigh doesen't apperiate the comments you normally make, even if you don't mean much about it.
Roger: That's because Kayleigh's just an uptight litle -

Kayleigh: Uptight little what!?
Roger: Oh for goodness sake.
Marge: You heard that?
Kayleigh: So come on then Roger! What it is about me you can't stand!?
Roger: I guess I'm just not used to being around women!
Kayleigh: You're married!
Roger: But I've known Marge for years, to be completely honest Kayleigh! I'm just old fashioned. I don't tend to hire women.
Kayleigh: What!?
Marge: Oh boy.
Kayleigh: Why?
Roger: Because it's just maiterntity leave after maiternity leave and babys after babys!
Kayleigh: Get out of my house! If you must know I'M pregnant!
Roger: Oh, really? I thought you were just fat.
Marge: ROGER! Kayleigh - we're sorry. It's just the way Roger is.
Kayleigh: Well the way Roger is - is sexist Marge! Get out of my house! I quit!
Roger: What?
Marge: You quit?
Kayleigh: I'm not working for a disgraceful sexist man like you! I suggest you get yourself a lawyer mister! I'm sueing your ass! You've done nothing but insult me!
Marge: What the!? Kayleigh - please.
Kayleigh: Don't miss with me - as I said I'm pregnant! My hormones are everywhere! Get out of my house! The pair of you!

Cate: Bryan it's me.
Bryan: What's the situation Cate?
Cate: I'm outside the Appleton's right now.
Bryan: I told you to not stick around! If they see you -
Cate: Don't you worry, I've got a plan.
Bryan: Just get whoever you can. We've gotta make Michelle suffer.
Cate: Will do. And trust me Bryan - nobody knows that more than me.

Elliot: Michelle could help me pack up my laptop please?
Michelle: I'm about to get the car sorted Elliot. Ben might need a hand.
Vanessa: I'll go Michelle, you go help Elliot.
Michelle: Alright.
Ben: Come on Vanessa.

Vanessa: What the!? That womans coming right at us!
Vanessa: Oh my god!

Ben: ARGH!
Vanessa: Ben!

Lennie: What's that noise? What's going out there?

Vanessa: Ben help!
Cate: Hello Vanessa, long time no see. Get in the car. Or I'll shoot you!
Vanessa: Don't hurt me!


William: Hey you!
Ben: What the!?

William: I thought it was you!
Ben: William what are you doing!? I let you and Kacey go!

William: But you still took the pub hostage you son of a bitch! My mother in law died because of your friend Cate!
Ben: William - please!
William: Stay down. I'm calling the police!
Ben: William don't do this!
William: Shut up!

Michelle: Dad what's going on!?
Lennie: Don't freak out! William's got Ben and he's calling the police, he got his phone out so what else could he be doing?!
Michelle: WHAT!? We have to go out and get him!
Lennie: No Michelle! You can't! Otherwise everyone will think we're in on with them! Ben loves you, he'll keep his mouth shut about your relationship!
Michelle: But he was part of the gang! He'll go down for years!
Lennie: I'm sorry Michelle. Wait - where's Vanessa!?

Vanessa: You're not going to kill me are you?
Cate: I don't know, all I know is we're gonna make your sister suffer Vanessa. One way or another.
Vanessa: But -
Cate: No more chit chat, keep your mouth shut!

Kacey: Hey Jen, what are you up too?
Jenna: Nothing much Kace, just going through my emails.
Kacey: I was thinking tomorrow, how would you like to snuggle up and the sofa and watch Christmassy films? Like we used too?
Jenna: Oh shucks I can't - I'm not twelve years old!
Kacey: Sheesh, what is up with you?
Jenna: You going out with Kevin! That's whats up with me!
Kacey: How did you know about that?
Jenna: Mum told me!

Kacey: Look -
Jenna: How could you go back to that guy Kace!? How could you forgive him!?
Kacey: Don't try and use that against me! You took Max back and he ditched you!
Jenna: That's different I wasn't pregnant with his baby! He wasn't a druggy like your boyfriend! What does he expect to just ditch you throughout the pregnancy and most of the raising then try and slither his way back in!
Kacey: It's my choice who I -
Jenna: You let that twat ruin your marridge to Eddie! TO EDDIE! The guy whose always stood by you and James through everything - you two were perfect for each other!
Kacey: Jenna, I...
Jenna: Don't talk to me Kace, I'm really not in the mood for it.

William: Honey you're not gonna believe what happened!
Kayleigh: I'm sueing Roger for every pence that guys got.
William: Wow today is a bizzare day. Erm, why?
Kayleigh: The guy is just constantly a sexist pig and he basically admitted to me that he doesen't hire women.
William: What!? He said that!?
Kayleigh: Yep.
William: Well even if he did you have no proof so the lawsuit would be a waste of time because it will be your word against -
Kayleigh: Oh really listen to this.

Roger: I'm just old fashioned. I don't tend to hire women.
Kayleigh: What!?
Marge: Oh boy.
Kayleigh: Why?
Roger: Because it's just maiterntity leave after maiternity leave and babys after babys!
(Sound clip ends)
William: You taped it all?
Kayleigh: Your damn right I did, that guys gonna lose his job - the sexist stubborn son of a bitch.
William: Please remind me never to miss with you when your six months pregnant.
Kayleigh: You know.

Later that night:

Megan: Come on everyone! Get changed!
Keria: Changed for what?
Megan: The opening of the restruant!
Keria: Seriously? We're going to that? You want to go to that?
Pauline: Yeah, I was hoping we could have a night in and watch some movies seeing as the girls are staying with my sister tonight.
Megan: Its Christmas Eve tomorrow! We need to go out and have some fun.
Keria: Okay me and Mum didn't want to tell you this but we heard that Barry is going.
Megan: What!? No!
Pauline: Yeah.
Megan: I'm ringing Kacey! I can't believe this!

Megan: Kace it's me.
Kacey: Hey Meg, you looking forward to tonight?
Megan: Oh I was until I discovered Barry's going!
Kacey: Oh about that - Eddie explained everything to me about Barry and Mary. You really should give Barry the benefit of the doubt before you -
Megan: Shut up Kacey! That man lied to me! You're no longer no friend of mine!
Kacey: Oh come on Meg, we've been friends for years please don't -
(Megan hangs up)

Megan: I can't believe her!
Keria: Don't worry Kace sit with us and watch some christmas movies!
Pauline: Sounds like a good night to me!

Jenna: Who was that?
Kacey: Megan, she's having troubles with Barry.
Jenna: Oh so she's not furious with you for ditching Eddie for Kevin then?
Kacey: I didn't ditch Eddie! He walked out on me! And I'm not going out with Kevin - we're just seeing each other!
Jenna: Whatever, is he going to be with us over Christmas?
Kacey: No. I haven't introduced him to James yet so I'll go see him for a bit on Christmas day.
Jenna: Pfft, you're going to introduce him to James?
Kacey: He is dad!
Jenna: Your pathetic Kacey.
Kacey: Jenna!

Louise: Guys come on the guests are turning up.
Jenna: Good, hopefully I can have a good night.
Kacey: Jen, can we please talk?
Jenna: No I don't want to talk too for the rest of the night.

Mina: Oh wow! Jenna, hiya! I didn't know you were visitng!
Jenna: Hey guys! It's great to see you both.
Aaron: You too! How have you been?

Karina: Hey Madeline, how are things at the hotel? Good, Mark needed a haircut and a shave! (Laugh). Yeah I saw Eddie and Jennifer earlier, I'm going to a party later tonight. It's gonna be strange to see everybody after almost a year though. When are you guys heading back? Wow that soon, yeah. You want me to what? Yeah sure that's no problem! I'd love to join you guys for Christmas dinner! Thanks so much! Alright, I'll see you tomorrow then, bye bye.

Mary: Ready to go Toby?
Mrs. Daniels: Hey.
Toby: Hiya Mrs. Daniels? How did Christmas shopping go?
Mrs. Daniels: Very well! I got alot of stuff for my daughter Erica! Why are you both so dressed so nicely?
Mary: We're off too the resturant launch.
Mrs. Daniels: What!? No way in hell are you going there Mary! I persaume Megan's going and there's no way you're going to ruin it for her! And Barry if he's there.
Mary: Don't tell me what to do woman!
Mrs. Daniels: You wanna stay in my house and ruin my christmas - fine! But I'm not gonna let you ruin everybody elses!
Mary: Where do you get your nerve?
Toby: Gargh! I'm going out for a walk, the two of you rowing does my head in!

Harry: I mean I know this partys gonna be good but I - hey Barry. Isn't that your kid?
Barry: Oh god! It's Toby, yeah! I'll see you inside.
Harry: Sure, good luck pal.

Toby: I wanted to talk to you.
Barry: Thanks so much bud! I really apperiate it.
Toby: My mums stories she tells me about you makes no sence, and it changes everytime I ask her about it? I just want awnsers. But a partys not really the place for it?
Barry: Sure, lets go back to the place where I'm staying yeah?
Toby: Alright.

Amelia: Vanessa when you get this message, just ring me back alright!?

Lennie: Awnser phone again!?
Elliot: Alright, this is really freaking me out! Where is she?
Amelia: Do you think she took advantage of the situation when Ben was arrested and just ran back to her friends place? We all knew she wanted to go back there?
Michelle: I just rang her friends mum, she's not with them. I could tell by her voice - she wasn't lying.
Lennie: God I'm starting to panic now!
Amelia: We all know Vanessa - she likes to leave for a while then come back. Lets just wait until tomorrow morning and if she's not by then or if she's not at her friends then we can start panicing! Alright?

Louise: You having a good night Tine?
Tina: Meh, not really.
Louise: What on earths the matter?
Tina: Nothing, it's just well I miss David - so much. I miss the way we used to be together. When our marridge was great it was the best.
Louise: Wow, Im suprised. I thought after this much time divorced that you'll be used to it by now.
Tina: No, I miss him so much Louise. I just want things to go back to how they was.
Louise: Then - just change it.
Tina: What?
Louise: Try and get back together.
Tina: Nah, I don't think that'd work. He wouldn't want too.
Louise: Tina, you're both good looking people and he's really well off - you've been divorced for years and yet none of you have got with anybody else. What does that tell you?
Tina: You're right.
Louise: Think about what I've said. I've gotta go mingle.
Tina: Alright, thanks Louise. You're the best.

Toby: You've got to be kidding? My mum... killed... I had a brother!?
Barry: I'm sorry to just dump all of this onto you Toby, but your mother isn't right in the head and she's been filling your head with lies!
Toby: I can't believe this.
Barry: You know I'm telling the truth right?
Toby: Yeah. You proved me by showing that newspaper article.
Barry: I was researching for proof - I was going to tell you this one way or another.
Toby: But I don't understand what's going on with you. Why are you living here if this isn't your house?
Barry: Because my girlfriend kicked me out because of your mother.
Toby: What!?

Barry: She lied and pertended that he was Mrs. Daniel's daughter and because I didn't tell Megan, my girlfriend, she threw me out and hasn't spoke to me since.
Toby: Where does she live?
Barry: Right next door to here, why?

Toby: Well come on!
Barry: Wait Toby - where are you going?

Toby: She's got to know the truth! My mums ruining peoples lives!
Barry: Toby! Wait!

Keria: Hi. Who are you?
Toby: Are you Megan?
Keria: No I'm Keria, who are you?
Megan: I'm Megan?

Toby: You have to take my dad back! You have to listen to the full story.
Megan: What? Who are you?
Toby: I'm Toby, Barry's son.
Megan: Oh my god. Barry has a son?
Toby: You've got to hear him out! My mum is crazy!
Keria: Look kid maybe you should just leave? Your creating a scene and our mums asslep upstairs.

Barry: Megan - I'm sorry about this.
Megan: Barry what's going on?
Barry: I'm sorry Megan, if you had let me explain earlier.
Keria: Then why don't you just now then?
Toby: Yeah! Go on! Tell Megan the truth!

Marie: Hey Harry, I was hoping to see you! I have some great news for you!
Harry: Oh hey Marie, what's up!
Marie: Fran's on a plane right now.
Harry: What?
Marie: She's coming home from Australia! She'll be here tomorrow, isn't that great!
Harry: Yeah, honestly that's fantastic! I've really missed her.
Marie: Ah I'm so glad you guys are gonna be back together, that's if you want to work things out?
Harry: Yeah. Of course!

Jenna: Mum! I've got great news!
Louise: What love?
Jenna: Max just called - he quit his job because he said he's sick of being away from me!
Louise: Oh honey that's fantastic!
Jenna: I won't leave now.
Louise: Why? Why stay around here?
Jenna: Really? Should I go now?
Louise: Jen - your husband has quit his well paid job in order to spend christmas with you! Get to him! You've spent every christmas of your life with us boring lot! Go on! Go!

Jenna: Oh this is so exciting mum! Max's home! I'll give you a call later.
Louise: Sure, I've gotta go sort out the food!

Jenna: Hey you.
Eddie: Oh hiya Jenna.
Jenna: You look down.
Eddie: Yeah, to be completely honest - between me and you. I'm devastated me and Kacey are over. And that's she with Kevin - it's destroying me.
Jenna: Don't worry you'll get back together.
Eddie: Pfft, yeah right.
Jenna: Seriously, my sister's being stupid right now but pretty soon she's going to realise - you've just gotta make her.
Eddie: What do you mean? How?
Jenna: I'm sure you'll think of something, take care Eddie.
Eddie: See ya Jenna. Merry Christmas.
Jenna: Merry Christmas.

As Jenna Wellington left Crystal Town in order to return to her beloved boyfriend as family was the most important thing in the entire world...

A brand new family was on their way to disown somebody.

And throw them onto the street.

For good.

Mary: They're gonna pay for this! They haven't heard the last of me. I'm gonna make their Christmas hell!

And little did the people inside know...

Mary would be true to her word, afterall - Mary didn't believe family was the most important thing in the world.

And that was the difference between a woman who would race home for a loved one.

And someone who is capable of killing.