Like Minded - Series 2 - Episode 1 - Prisoner Of My Own Mind

No matter what happens to you, or how you feel, the world doesn’t care.

 

You could die, and the world would not stop to grieve.

People die everyday, their lives are shattered, and yet the world still keep moving.
Someone asked me once. “My husband is dead. Why does the world keep bringing days and nights if, without my husband, the world is nothing to me?”

My answer to her was…that the world simply doesn’t give a damn.
It doesn’t care if people die.
It doesn’t care if people are born.

It obviously won’t care if someone disappears off the face of the earth.
I always felt like that here.
As if I had disappeared from the real world. Secluded from my own life.

A prisoner of my own mind.

It had been 4 months. I had counted the days and months.

I would stand by the window, wondering. I’d spend nearly everyday watching the same scenery, listening to the same birds. No cars ever really drove past. When it rained, the sound echoed throughout the building, like a warning. When the sun shone…I was trapped inside.

Woman: …Nurmel? I see you’re up early again today.
Nurmel: It beats staying in bed doing nothing.
Woman: (laugh) Yes, I suppose so. Are you watching things outside the window?
Nurmel: …Maybe. It’s what I’ve been doing for the past year, if you hadn’t noticed.
Woman: Did you have nice normal dreams?
Nurmel: I didn’t dream.
Woman: I see. That’s fine.

I hardly slept.

Woman: Ah, I see you’ve been catching up with your reading. Let’s see…a book about bunnies? Why, isn’t that nice?
Nurmel: (mutter) Oh brother…
Woman: Tell you what; let’s go have a read, shall we?
Nurmel: …Yes, Doctor Kelsey.
Doctor: There’s a good girl.

HUL Institute. It sounded like a joke. They treated me like a little girl, rather than a 17-year old teenager.

Doctor: Now then, let’s have a chat.
Nurmel: I thought we were going to read.
Doctor: We are. But that doesn’t stop us chatting, does it?
Nurmel:
Doctor: You’ve been making progress, Nurmel. But how do you feel about it?

Nurmel: Well, how am I supposed to feel?
Doctor: Excuse me?
Nurmel: You ask me everyday, “how do you feel?” You know bloody well how I feel!
Doctor: Nurmel, there’s no need to raise your voice.
Nurmel: Yes there is! Because you piss me off so much I wanna kill you!!
Doctor: Nurmel! That sort of language is uncalled for!
Nurmel: Like I give a damn!

Doctor: Nurmel, sit down at once!
Nurmel: You ask me everyday, “have you had nice dreams?” Whether I had visions or not, I’m not gonna tell you!
Doctor: Nurmel, there’s nothing wrong with your dreams-
Nurmel: THEN WHY THE HELL AM I HERE??!!
Doctor: Please, calm down or I’ll take you to the Quiet Room!
Nurmel: You all look at me as if I’m insane, but I’m not! I’m a normal teenage girl! Why does everyone insist I need help??
Doctor: Because normal people don’t have visions of another living person! …
Nurmel:
Doctor: Nurmel. I’m going to take you to the Quiet Room. This was obviously a bad idea.

Doctor: I’ll see how you are in an hour’s time.
Nurmel: NO! I hate this room! Please don’t lock me in here!!
Doctor: You must understand, Nurmel. It’s for your own good.

It’s like a scratched record. Some days I play along with it. Some days, like that day, I snap and let all my pent up anger release itself. Those days are the worst.

I hate the Quiet Room. It’s supposed to be blue, to calm people when they’ve gone out of control. There are some people who practically live in the Quiet Room, they’re so messed up they just scream all the time.

Why can’t they understand? Why can’t they just explain to me why I am this way?
I knew why.
It’s because they were scared.

They were scared of something they couldn’t explain. No one could explain it. I had an unexplainable problem.
I see visions. Of another person, living probably on the other side of the world. She’s become like a friend to me, and yet she has no idea I exist. I watch her live her life, with envious eyes. I can never do the things she does. I’m stuck in this loony bin probably for life.

I’ve learnt something. On days when I snap, those are usually the days I have my visions. I like to have them in the Quiet Room. Then no one else can see you when you collapse…into unconsciousness.

Bridle’s High School for Girls

Mia: Yo, songstress. What’s up?
Melody: Oh, hey, Mia.
Mia: You look a little down. Anything I can help with?
Melody: Ah…no. I guess I’m just anxious about the future.
Mia: Heh, so am I! But don’t you worry. I bet you could get into any university you wanted.
Melody: N-no…I’m hardly smart enough.
Mia: You’d be surprised!
Melody: …Erm, Mia? I didn’t notice this photo before.
Mia: Heh, you like it? I found it in the bottom of my drawer, I must have forgotten about it ages ago.

Melody: Is this…your family?
Mia: Yup! It was taken a good few years ago. That’s me at the bottom, in the cute top. Don’t I look so adorable!
Melody: Yeah…sure.
Mia: (giggles) it was the anniversary of when we first moved into our house. I was about…10 at the time.
Melody: Wow, that’s a long time ago.
Mia: It gives me warm memories whenever I look at it.

Melody: You know…you haven’t really told me a lot about your family.
Mia: I haven’t? Can’t imagine why. I tell loads of people about my family!
Melody: Well, you haven’t told me.
Mia: In that case, I’ll tell you everything now.

Mia: You can probably guess the two old folks are my parents.
Melody: Yeah, I guessed that.
Mia: My mom’s a fashion designer. She works from home a lot, and a few years ago we had to have an extension to the house, in order to put in her sewing machine and all that!
Melody: Wow.
Mia: She’s made me some clothes, but I usually just buy other clothes. I mean, I don’t want to look like a model for my mom, do I? That would be embarrassing!
Melody: I guess not.
Mia: My dad works for a law firm. He’s usually out during the daytime, working with clients and all that. He’s a little grumpy if he has a rubbish case, but he’s mostly fun to be with.
Melody: Sounds like hard work.
Mia: Nah, it’s usually a breeze.

Melody: So that boy is…your brother?
Mia: You guessed right! That’s Phil. He’s 5 years older than me, so he was around 15 when this photo was taken.
Melody: So has he graduated from university then?
Mia: Sort of. He’s training with the police. It’s odd; when he was younger he was such a punk. Now he’s going to fight crime or whatever it is. He hasn’t really told me much about it.

Melody: I envy you. You have such a nice family.
Mia: Perhaps one day, I can introduce you! I’m sure they’d welcome you with open arms.
Melody: That would be lovely.
Mia: Say, Melody, you haven’t really told me a lot about your family either! I know you have a dad, mom and younger sister, but that’s about it!
Melody: Oh…right…

Mia: Come on, come on! Spill the beans!
Melody: Erm…I…you don’t want to know.
Mia: Why? Is it that bad?
Melody: I don’t really want to talk about it.
Mia: They must have done something bad to make you not want to tell me, your bestest friend!
Melody: …yeah.

Nurmel: Family…who needs family?

I knew exactly how Melody felt. I knew the sort of things she’d been through. And not just from my visions.

I had been thrown away by my own family. Because they were gullible and scared.

Nurmel: And I hate them.

Somewhere in the city

Man: It looks like a nice day. That’s good to know.

I’ve got to get out of here at some point.